(This was an article submitted to the Reflections column in the Warrnambool Extra)
After more than 30 years of marriage, it’s great that I can honestly say my wife and I still love each other.
Not that it’s always been easy. Sometimes it was Heaven and sometimes it was more like… well, you know.
Our wedding vows were all about a commitment before God to follow His ways and to love each other, no matter what. This commitment has forced both of us, over the years, to deal with deep personality issues like pride, selfishness, insecurity, and low self-esteem. We started out “in love” but learning to love each other turned out to be something very different, something that was only possible as we allowed God to work massive changes in us.
Here’s a little insight for all those who think that marriage should change with the times. You’ve got it back to front. Marriage is meant to change you! Your attempts to redefine marriage to suit your lifestyle choices will inevitably undermine the power of marriage to do what it’s supposed to do in you.
These days, many people reject God and many others have rejected marriage. I suspect this is mainly from a desire for life to line up with their personal preferences. But we don’t grow as human beings by getting everything our own way. We don’t learn the true meaning of love by getting our own needs met.
Marriage is about a man and a woman, annoyingly different but wonderfully complementary, growing together in a giving relationship because their commitment of love will not allow the easy way out.
Marriage is God’s invitation to grow.
